Scraping the Barrel, and Sundry Accusations

I said I’d seen the May Queen on my way here,

And I laughed about the Church Mouse in the park.

You angrily assume that something’s ‘happened’,

Although I just went through there for a lark.

And so I can confess no indiscretion---

I guess our sense of humour’s miles apart.

And then you looked me in the eye and told me

That the people there are filth and none too smart!

Did you forget the famous night we met there?

It was raining; you were slumming in the dark.

What did you take me for?

And why did you ask for more?

If it’s me you’re out to hurt, you’ve hit the mark.

But now that you’ve decided I’m unworthy

Of your respect or further understanding,

I may as well remind you of the nights when

We lay apart, and you were---undemanding.

And like a fool I told you that I loved you;

A thing I’ve rarely thought would come to be.

But you just smiled and shook your head and lay there.

You couldn’t find such simple words for me.

I guess you had a right not to believe me.

Although you must have seen that I was green.

Well, why don’t you slam that door?

I’m not about to take much more.

You’re gentle when we’re all alone,

But in a crowd, I’m on my own.

Did you expect I’d play king to your queen?

And one more thing, while we’re still on the subject:

At times I can not understand at all,

How when we are alone you are so quiet,

But in the bars, one hears you wall-to-wall.

You always play the life of every party

In your need for admiration and applause,

Ignore me till my eyes begin to wander,

Then play the jealous spouse and show your claws.

Are you afraid you’ll lose me to another?

I might just find a better man than you.

So what am I staying for?

I think it’s time to slam that door!

You say that it’s been good so far?

What could bad be? Stop the car!

I’m sorry if this hurts you, but we’re through.

Graz 1980