Jealousy... you never know where the green-eyed monster is going to turn up....

My day wasn't fun.... hope yours was. I had to humple where I had to go, and the air was sultry and humid, and it made my ankle hurt. This is progress, btw.... The last three weeks were a martyrdom... As in.... it fucking hurt.

My new neighbors, the pretty ones, have been doing a beach party on the strip of green outside these past few days. For their two year old, Anna, who is just learning to talk. She looks like a veritable cherub, she does.... Points at me, and says 'René.' Wow, the third word I have heard her say.... (smile). It goes so fast when they start prattling, and brought back some fond memories of when I was young, and baby-sat my cousin's daughter.

But mostly, I got my 'stuff' done and sent off an email for an appointment at 'the BUNKER'. With a cc to the unemployment people to make it look like I am at least trying.... And then the phone rang.

It was someone wanting to look up a telephone number. A dangerous neighbor. And they can rattle me, oh yes. Well if you do not know where they are living, it is very hard to find that in the local internets telephone book, which I guess is what they wanted. So I had to go over. And THEN Preciousses, I got a two-hour 'Intervention', that I really did NOT need. Not from them especially. About my Peter.... Fuck...

And they were angry that I 'visit' the French Foreign Legion Guy, and not them. And THOSE are are two pair of shoes, as we say. The FFL guy never yells at me. Or tells me what to do with my life. These people do the latter. And.... they go at one another like cats and dogs. And you end up on the side-lines, watching. Oh, no. I hate that. And I told them that. 'I didn't say hello, because you were busy fighting, or it very much sounded like it, and than I just make a wiiiide circle around your mess.' (I was angry, and wouldn't have used that last word, but I did.)

But today.. they never went that far before...

Concern trolls. Just fucking concern trolls, and they made me angry.....

Certainly because there was truth there... but they twisted it, and should just go where the pepper grows, hey.

So no, otherwise no news... and I am very, very tired.

I.... am certifyably STUPID. Oh yes, I am...

I got this letter from the unemployment office to go and apply for a job as receptionist at a BUNKER of an hotel. So today, my foot was half-way good. And I still have to use a cane to get around. So I got myself all spruced up, white shirt, tie, suit coat, whatever. And got on the bus and went out there. (You either go or they cut off your unemployment money, and I need a signature on the fucking form.) Using the bus was a nuisance. The distance from the bus stop to the hotel was long----if you have to use a cane. Dirty, hot day, humid. Disgusting.

So I humpled up into the lobby, and said, 'I have this letter here saying I have to apply for a receptionist job. Is it still open? I couldn't get here any sooner. I sprained my leg.' And all these twenty-something young things were in and out looking at my papers.

Do you have any papers, an official application, your life's experience, and a report from the people you worked for last?

Talk about feeling like getting pissed on. Not that I have, but I imagine it would be like that....

I said, 'No, but can I make an appointment?'

'Call, or do it per internet.' The head of the personnel dept. wasn't there today. Swell, I sweat blood getting there, and that was all I got an a card. Thirty two years ago, you could walk off the street after reading a want ad, get an interview, and that was ok... Now?

My very dear colleague had asked me on Sunday if I had gotten a report, and I said no, I had been too sick to even think of that. But I have to provide one. And yesterday, I had called my former place of business, and another 'good' colleague was on the horn, and when I asked him about it, he said, 'YOU talk to HER.' And I thought, 'no WAY.' He sounded frightened to even broach the subject with her. Which means she was way off the charts for rage about 'something'....

So I mailed the one person in Vienna of the bosses who seems to like me, and explained, and politely asked for one from THEM, in Vienna, not from Graz. I also let him know that what they 'thought' was best... wasn't. Am convinced they didn't know what would happen....

So that they will not do that to anyone else..... you know?

So far no answer, but he doesn't mail. But I hope to get one in my mail-box in a couple of days....

So NOW I have to prepare some papers, Preciousses. A Lebenslauf. (The story of your life in short form. Data, education, where you worked, etc.) And an official request to be a coolie for a pittance. (They pay shit, believe me...) But I fucking NEED that signature, so will have to get cracking.

Isn't life just FUCKING great.....

At least I didn't go into nerve fever or throw up.

Oh. Looks like 'vacation' is over.....

hBefore I go into THAT... the German news this morning suddenly maintained that there were 'nly' 23,00 people out to see Barry in Berlin yesterday. So they halved it. After saying there were 450.000 people there. Boy, he must have scared someone, that is for sure....

Was over at Peter's. Absconded with Sweeney after we watched it again so I can lend it to a former colleague of mine, who loves it.....

Tja, how to put this, huh? I found a fucking letter from the unemployment office when I got home. Oh, they are good.... I don't have to present myself there before October, but oh no.... I have to go present myself for a new job. Somebody has a flea up their ass, that is for sure.... This is JULY! In July and August, everyone goes on vacation. No one works. BUT....

It turns out that a big hotel a bus-ride away is looking for a receptionist, you see, and one of the left-behinds sent me a letter to go there and 'present' myself and try to get the position. Even theough the damned pension people are still sitting on their hands. And for swing-shifts to top it off.... I was not pleased, Preciousses, but bureaucracy here... well you would end up with a tome the size of a dictionary here if you were to attempt to describe it. And this time, if I do not go, I lose my fucking pittance for unemployment.

Tja, so I will go over there on Monday. What FUN. I know the establishment, and they are exactly as cheap as anyone downtown, oh yes. Want a lot, pay little.

It will be especially fun to walk in with a cane, hey, because I still can't do without it yet. And will not shave off my new beard. I will get it trimmed tomorrow. No more Caspar Milquetoast. And at my age? No way I get hired. I just have to go over and humiliate myself. Right.... fun...

Where the FUCK do people get off, ruining my July? I already DECLARED this year CANCELLED! And I sincerely need to be left the fuck alone.

Is that so hard to understand? Shit, am going back under the bed....

Okay, beaurocacy SUCKS...

I got this letter today, I didn't present my passport and birth certificate to the pension people, and they were gonna terminate my application for a pension by May 22nd.

Well, the fact IS, Preciousesss... I did that weeks ago. I took the originals to the pension office, with photocopies, the guy checked them and passed them on to my file.

So I got on the horn, and whaddaya know, the 'lady' didn't understand what 'birth registration' means.

Right.

Well, we got that cleared up, at any rate..... This is all so draining.