Oh man.... I'm getting dislodged.... isn't that a kick in the pants, hey

This screaming HARPY was out in the courtyard, and I guess I have till September to get out of here.....
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Ya know what? EVERYONE has a point where they just break. And that was it.

Y'know... where you just can't DO it anymore. I've never DONE anything untoward to ANYONE in my life... intentionally....

(Yeah, you can hurt people unintentionally, and it leave scars.)

And this fucking idjit is screaming into her cell phone, heard most of it. Ending with, 'Thank Gawd I got the security deposit.' It was 20,ooo Schillings, and that was lots of money back then.

Well, hells bells, hey. I always paid my rent, the fake accrued costs, have been a model of propriety.

I do not NEED that woman trying to break into my house.

She did, but I broke the lock some time ago, and had it changed, and didn't get a 'double'.

She's a piece of work.
It
And you know what? I am SO tired, so exhausted, I don't care any more.

I really do not.

So.... I have made a decision. Am about to leave the planet.

I have an Ablebensversicherug, a death insurance. A needle and something that will do the job. Not a drug. But nearly as good.

I will just fall asleep, my organs will shut down, and I will be gone.

It won't be tomorrow, have too much to square away first.

And I will be so NICE when Charlotte visits, which is only days away...

But I have decided, and it has been in the back of my head for a long time now.

Now will be the time.

I can't just DO this all over again.

In the course of my life, everything was a fight. Justice, things that I thought were important, and they were irrelevant. I never made a difference, as far as I can tell...

The fight has gone out of me completely.

But I tried, oh gawwd, how I tried to make a difference.

I am down on the ground, and I don't think I will get up ever.

All I CAN say is that I have loved.... deeply. Whether it was people far away, or people here... I loved, and cared, and they enriched me.

That was wonderful.

Makes no sense to hang around any longer....

Just don't get on my case about this.

I WILL be going, and soon.

Better you know now, and not have it come as a 'surprise'.

My days are so empty lately.... what's to hang around for?