So... after being ill all day, and figuring the time differences...

I was again able to talk to my father today.

Thanks to a wonderful friend.

I usually never get so emotional, but he isn't the father I had five weeks ago.

I DO call, y'know.

There was so much in there... I don't want to get into it right now, I just do not. At least I stopped crying, so that is a good sign, .....maybe.

I'm a rational human being, and have 'some' edumacation... however...

You put a 94 year old man into full narcosis, he is NOT going to be who you knew.

And yes, I expected that....

Oh, he's fine... nothing to complain about. But not who he was.

The fucking HAMMER was.... my Aunt is in the same place. She has Alzheimer's, just like her sister, my step-mother. She has a separate apartment, and everything, but nothing to cook with, because... they forget and could burn the house down.

But she visits him on her good days.

She was always one of my favorite relatives. The first birthday cake I ever had was from her. It was a carousel, and I was fascinated. I was eight years old.

We met in Munich just after I got here, and had a wonderful time.

So THAT knocked me on my ass...

I do not know what else to say at the moment.

Other than to thank my friends for being so supportive, and I love them very much.