To top off the year....

Windows XP didn't want to start, and then told me someone had hacked into my system.

Well, Christ almighty, I am really not 'interesting' in any sense of the word.....

It really was the high point in what has been the nadir of my life.

I want to take this last year, crumble it up like aluminum foil, and throw it in the garbage, and I have never felt that way about years... evah.

It began at 4 a.m. I answered some e-mails. Y'know, time differences and all that shit.

And to my utter shock, the post down below got interpreted wrongly, and I had the wrath of the goddess on my head.

So to re-cap..... I do not, repeat, not hate Americans. I learned that something had changed in a broken system and seemingly got better and I was very happy it did, because the policies were so damaging.

There was a back and forth, and before I knew it.... it was nearly nine a.m. and I had told Peter I would be there by then and take him to the bank.

When I got there, he was crying because he thought I'd forgotten. It was terrible.

Just fucking terrible.

But it got worse. It did....

We had some nice bus drivers today. They let out the ramps so I could wheel him up and not fucking HEAVE his 106 kilos into them. Probably because it is a horriday, and they were feeling 'cheery'... Or something. They don't, usually, just look out of winder....

So they don't notice you,

Ya know, if you are lazy or something.

so WOW...

Yeah, today was like a fucking roller-coaster ride.

Except, the drivers were all 'excited'. They zoomed off, braked hard, and if you are standing in one, and used to it...they were not 'normal'. And as we were going back, the driver braked really hard, and I lost my stance. And stumbled and stepped on an old woman's foot... hard.

I'd been concentrating on Peter's wheelchair, and holding it because the brakes are kaputt.

And then I hear, 'OW!' and look behind me..... She must be eighty, or over. It was so horrible, I absolutely am crushed. I would never, Ever, hurt someone intentionally like that. I was ompletely freaked out. It was horrendous. And then she wished me a fucking Happy New Year... Oh gawwdI have NEVER been so mortified. I fell all over myself, apoligising. It was horrible.

As some know.... I have been fighting with the Telly-com. You never want to mess with those folks. I get really nice people on the service line, and ice-cold bitches who probably live at the North Pole, it differs from call to call. Whoever is on the horn, and yes I know, they are service people and probably underpaid, so I am never disrespectful to them.

But some of them... are really of the charts for disresectful. It was about a double of a bill, and the sum was over four hundred Euros. I freaked.I cleared it up, and she calmed me down.

But I told the woman on the line how I had to hear about.... 'he cant get to a phone if he is sick, what if he were to die? ' And got ' that's none of our business. Or when I heard, 'as you might know, after that is Christmas,and I told her that every fool in the world knows when that is, and get off my back.

So I cleared everything up, stressed that I didn't mean her, but that I found some people very obnoxious. And not right in 'the World According to Ren'. You give and get respect in that world....

She seemed sort of shocked. 'None of us are trained so say such horrible things. That is horrible.'

And said, 'No, it was hurtful'.

His connection will be turned back on soon.

Sometimes I feel like Don Quixote going off fighting windmills.

Google has been eating some of my text since I began writing it.

I still got through, and got to the end....

Something isn't right here.

And I am NOT Ghengis Kahn...

It is just about a bad end to a very bad year.

And in that sense... I wish everyone a good new decade... And just btw... This is the third night that I have a leak somewhere, and the air from outside is so toxic, I would like to throw up.